Revolving Door

Yesterday I saw a couple confront the reality that they were about to go quite some time without seeing each other. They were standing on the sidewalk, extending each second as long as they could. When he held her as closely and as tightly as she could bear, I couldn’t help but look away and pretend like I didn’t see them and hope that they didn’t see me either. She got into the car and he stayed put on the sidewalk. I didn’t know them, but I know that feeling, one of heartache and insecurity. This is just a little piece of creative writing inspired by two strangers.

 

Here I am again

caught in a mental storm

wondering if I should look away

or lock my gaze.

What is it about seeing two people

share a kiss

that creates such a confusing crisis

I want to look away

and give them

the privacy

the intimacy

the silent moment they deserve.

And yet here I am

stuck in this revolving door

wondering if they would mind

letting me

take a peek

at this moment between two

when two become

more than two

when emotions become actions

Would they mind?

Could I look their way

for just a moment

to see something so magical

so daring

so full of life.

I am spinning

watching as the wave of emotion

overtakes two

as they become more than two

The wave of emotion crashes down

as I am watching

from the other side

of the glass wall created by this moment

this time.

They are frozen

as if the waves and the foam and the ocean spray

are suddenly locked in place

something so natural stuck in an unnatural way

I know the feeling

and I wish I could freeze my time too

but instead I’ll turn

I’ll continue to push through this revolving door

and not let them see

that although they feel like the first Adam and the first Eve

that here

on the other side of the dissolving glass

the world is spinning

for them

and for us

in more ways than one.

What is it about seeing two people share a moment like this

that makes me want to turn away

and let them exist in their own world?

Perhaps it is the remembrance of the same feeling

that makes me look away

or maybe it is knowing that

for one moment

I am not real to them

and for that reason

I will voluntarily cease to exist

so they can live in this moment

just as I have

so many times before.

 

 – Celia Glenn –

 

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